A Lazy No-Bake Dark Chocolate Protein Cake

Laziness killed this cake. It didn’t kill it in the sense of absolutely destroying it but it killed it all right. And it was my fault, it was my laziness that did it :-( What happened? I left out the avocados. You see, I was going to mush a couple of avocados into the cake because avocados yield absolutely magical no-bake chocolate cakes. But I forgot to buy them and, instead of going to the store to get some when I started making this cake, I thought ‘beh’ and used Quark instead (Quark is a type of low-fat cheese that can be subbed with blended cottage cheese or a combo of blended cottage cheese and greek yogurt). I’m sorry for this, guys. I let you down. I promised you the best no-bake dark chocolate protein cake on earth and this isn’t it. It’s really nice, don’t get me wrong! And I’m going to happily munch a slice with my pre-workout coffee for the next couple of days. The problem is that the cake isn’t as smooth as I wanted it to be, no. It’s not ‘silky’ if you know what I mean. It’s more… like a big protein bar! It lacks… fat. But I’m giving you the recipe anyways because I want YOU to fix it! You can do it. I’ll tell you how. It’s really easy. Start by buying two avocados.


1 pot Quark 
1/2 cup cocoa powder
1/2 cup Sunwarrior Chocolate Warrior Blend (or chocolate casein)
1/8 cup psyllium husks (or ground almonds)
1/8 cup granulated stevia (or your sweetener of choice)
1 and 1/4 cup almond milk (or any milk you like)
1 tablespoon coconut flour


Blend it all together and press it onto a small nonstick springform tin before sprinkling extra cocoa on top. Let it sit in the fridge for an hour and presto: your cake is done. Cut yourself a slice, add some of coffee foam on top and BOOM: nommage

How to Add in the Avocado

If you want to set this cake on proper fire, mush two ripe avocados into the mix, omit the Quark, and add bit more protein powder until you get to a nice flourless-cakey consistency. Sprinkle with extra cocoa on top and leave it to set in the fridge before digging in. 


1. If you don’t want to use psyllium husks, add some ground almonds instead! 2. To make the cake even more intense, consider melting 1/4 bar of dark chocolate and mixing THAT into the cake mix.

If In Fear…

If you don’t want to fix the recipe yourself and get dirty with experimenting, I promise I will remember about the avocados next time and share with you my recipe for the best no-bake dark chocolate protein cake on earth. I’ll do it next week – because there’s only so much chocolate cake a girl can eat without delving into the realms of indecency ;-)

Macros per Serving (out of 8): 

4.5g CARBS (out of which 1.7g is just fiber!)
12.1g protein
4.7g fat

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