Picture this:
Picture this:

[Man reading the back of a protein powder tub]: “This product contains carboxemethyl cellulose!? I wonder, what is that?! And why it’s here!?”

[Master of Label appears]

“Wonder no more, good sir! Let me explain what carboxemethyl cellulose (aka E466) is. It’s a thickener. It’s commonly used in protein powders to add body – or ‘bulk’ – to one’s food, in the case of the product you’re holding, one’s protein shakes. Carboxemethyl cellulose is generally regarded as safe for human consumption.”

“HOWEVER,” the master of Labels continues as the clouds come in and darken the sky:

“An article published in Nature this year noted that in mice, relatively low concentrations of Carboxymethyl Cellulose ‘induced low-grade inflammation and obesity/metabolic syndrome in wild-type hosts and promoted robust colitis in mice predisposed to this disorder.’ So my verdict to you, good sir, is: do your best to opt against it.”

[Man]: “Ah thank you Master of Labels! I see no point in consuming Carboxemethyl Cellulose now. I’ll look for a powder without it. Thanks! What oh what would I do without you!”

[Up-close shot of Master of Labels, winking]

[Credits roll in]