When did you find out the truth about Santa? I did when I was ten and found a white beard and a Santa Claus hat inside my dad’s gym bag. It was the morning of Christmas eve. As soon as I saw them, I knew. So I took them out of the bag and walked around the house until I found my dad, sitting on the kitchen table reading the morning newspaper. I put the beard and the hat on the table and demanded an explanation – DAD! What IS this! He looked at the beard, looked at the hat, and for a few minutes actually sat there trying to convince me that he had no idea where they came from. So I went to my parents’ room to find more evidence and there I found them: my presents, under my parents’ bed – all wrapped in the same paper with a label saying ‘To Anna From Santa’. That was all the evidence I needed. I rounded up as many as I could carry, took them to the kitchen, placed them on the table and I asked him to explain THIS! And then we both laughed. He, because he was cornered and there was nothing he could say and me, because, well… I kind of already guessed about Santa’s true identity but had played along with the idea because I felt that feigning innocence would lead to better gifts. But I was ten so… hey, that’s too old to keep on playing right?
Regardless of the revelation though, we always made cookies for “Santa.” Mostly because, much like my dad (shocker!), Santa appeared to LOVE homemade cookies. I suppose it’s one of those things that makes the trouble of having to hide the presents and sneak around in the middle of the night *somewhat* worth it. Right? It’s a kind of like a secret ‘thank you’. Kind of like an implicit message saying, “OK, buddy, you’re done with the whole thing. Now you can sit down and drink your milk and enjoy your cookies. They’re all yours. You’re done for another year. Ho. Ho. Ho.”
Obviously there’s more to Christmas than cookies though. Or Santa Clauses. Or trees. Or presents! It’s about love and spending time with one’s family, and peace, and giving, and light, and oy! I wish you guys a wonderful Christmas – if, of course, you celebrate it. If you don’t, then I wish you a wonderful next few days too! And I hope these cookies give you joy and protein happiness in abundance!
4 tablespoons cashew nut butter (or peanut butter though cashew’s probably slightly better)
1/2 cup vanilla whey protein powder (I’m using this stuff!)
2 tablespoons coconut flour
1/2 cup almond milk
2 chopped squares of 85% dark chocolate
1. Mix all the above ingredients together until you get a sticky batter.
2. Taste this batter to ensure it’s sweet enough and tastes so good that you’d happyly eat the whole batter. Don’t eat the whole batter though. I know ’tis’ the Season’ and all but, come on, mobilize some self-restraint. You’re an adult.
3. Bake the batter on a cookie tray as four ‘blobs’. You can bake them as six too if you want to make smaller cookies or two if you want to make gigantic ones (it’s up to how big your Santa’s appetite is).
4. Bake at 160 C (320 F) for about 15-20 minutes or until they’re cooked on the inside and on top.
5. Now, here’s the important part: do NOT cook them all the way through. Keep them gooey in the center. They might feel underbaked when you take them out but they’ll be really nice and soft inside when they cool. Trust me here.
6. Stick them on a plate, pour a glass of milk, and leave them under the tree.
Like I said above, if you don’t celebrate Christmas or if there’s no cookie-munching Santa in your family that would appreciate cookies, no need to worry. The cookies are good for any and all occasions. Scrap that, they’re awesome! Make them and you’ll see.
Macros per Serving (out of 4):
4g fiber so net carbs = 4.4g)